


35 Years Alive

by Slytherwitch



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Drabble, Falling Out of Love, M/M, Post-Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Post-Sirius Black in Azkaban
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-14
Updated: 2020-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:00:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23137324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slytherwitch/pseuds/Slytherwitch
Summary: Sirius Black clings to his youth like he needs air to breath. Remus Lupin doesn't care about time anymore. Both of them know that what they have won't ever be like it used to, but neither of them can leave the other.
Relationships: Onesided Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, Sirius Black & Remus Lupin
Kudos: 4





	35 Years Alive

"Everyone forgets that we're still young." He pauses, turns towards his partner. "We're still young, aren’t we?"

Sirius Black looks in the mirror, but he doesn't see himself; he sees the man he loves, Remus Lupin.

Remus looks up at him, a book being forsaken for the melodramatics of his lover. He stares at his prematurely greying hair and sunken eyes. The dark circles under his eyes and the pale skin are very un-Sirius-like, but now, nothing is like him anymore. Remus responds, "I don't think so."

Sirius scoffs, "I'll never grow old."

Sirius refuses to look himself in the eyes. The hollowed holes that used to spring life into the world, the hair cut short due to the dreaded nature it became, the skin so pale he doesn't even look like a Black anymore--they're all cosmetic signs of the years gone by.

"And what about me," Remus muses, "What will happen to me?"

Neither of them look the other in their eyes. Each think of the other men that used to stand beside them as friends. That's all they can be now. Even with the underlying feelings, both of them harbor.

"You've always been old," Sirius laughs. It's as fake as what they have now, but that's all he can muster.

"I suppose I have." Remus turns the page.

From the outside, this looks like a friendly conversation. Two friends, maybe two people of something more, having a laugh, telling each other jokes. But that's never the case anymore. There is a sadness, a mourning of the people they once were and that they could've become. 

"Tea?" Remus asks.

Sirius shakes his head, violently. He slips, knocking himself into the mirror. A bitter laugh escapes him as he falls, being cascaded by shattered glass.

"Are you alright?"

"Nothing worse than the dementors dearest Moony."

Remus holds the hand of a smiling man. The childish, crazed man he loves or loved at one point. 

Sirius looks at the man who's never changed in his eyes. The man he'll love for a lifetime and then as many of them as he'll be allowed.

Neither of them say another word, leaving the mirror broken. The bad luck in the air just adds to the misfortunate tale love has weaved for them. There's no healing here.


End file.
